The Fear of Disappointing People: People-Pleasing and Self-Sacrifice
“I just didn’t want to let them down.” If I had a dollar for every time I said that—out loud…
Latest Articles
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My Voice Was Too Loud – Until It Was Gone
Silencing Yourself to Be Accepted I used to believe my voice was a problem. Too opinionated. Too emotional. Too intense.…
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When ‘Nice’ Meant Numb: Performing Kindness Over Truth
There was a time when I didn’t question my voice. I just used it. I spoke with the kind of…
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Raised to Obey: The Apology Habit: Over-Apologizing & Shrinking
We say “sorry” when we bump into someone. “Sorry” when we speak up. “Sorry” when we take up space. “Sorry”…
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Raised to Obey: Obedience and Conditioning
The “good girl”. Quiet. Agreeable. Polite. Kind. Careful not to offend. But what looked like goodness was really obedience —…
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RAISED TO OBEY SERIES:
I recall this memory so clearly. Every morning, just before I got out of the car for school, my father…
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Hello world!
My name is Silondile Ndhlovu. I am a thinker and conversation-starter exploring the real stories behind gender, identity, and emotional…